Barry Bennett on Marriage... don't get any ideas.

Barry Bennett-Discipleship Evangelism Lessons 10 & 11

Marriage

Why do two people get married?
Many come into marriage, and the woman will have on concept of it (Princes wedding, prince charming, kids), and the man a totally different idea.
Did you get married to make yourself feel complete? If you are just getting married for spiritual reasons, you are going to be sadly saddened, two incomplete people can’t complete each other. Spiritually each one has to know who they are in Christ. Physically, mentally, and emotionally a married couple can strengthen each other. But spiritually you are already complete in Christ.
You don’t get married to simply feel better about yourself.
Is love why we get married? And do we even know what Love is?

Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His Purpose.”
If you don’t know the purpose of something, then you can’t use it! Ever have those random switches on the wall of your house that “don’t actually do anything”? They have a purpose, the idea is to find out what the things are for.
The Natural Purpose of Marriage, Genesis 2:18 And the Lord God said, it is not Good that man should be alone; I will make an help meet for him.”
The first purpose of marriage is fellowship. It is not good to be alone.
Second one, Fidelity, Faithfulness, to be satisfied with one person, to become “one flesh” to be faithful to that one person with which you are in Covenant.
1 Corinthians 7:2 “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication (Sex outside of marriage), let each man have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.”
Genesis 1:28 “And God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply”
Third Purpose, Family! God is going to fill the earth with Families. But today we have “dysfunctional families” and “same sex families” the world has lost the purpose of marriage in this.
The home should be a blessed place, a place of joy and peace and fellowship.

Heavenly Purpose
Ephesians 5:31-32 “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh, this is a great mystery: but I speak of Christ and the church.” Every marriage between man and woman is a reflection of Christ and the Church. It is a heavenly revelation of Christ and the Church.

The problem is, society has lost the purpose of marriage, and once you lose the purpose of it, then anything goes! Why two men? Why two women? Where does the two come from? God, so if you are going to throw out Man and Woman which came from God, why not toss out two as well? Why not three, four, eight, and anyone or anything else you love in there too. Once you lose the purpose, you are headed for trouble!

The Spiritual purpose
Ephesians 5:21 “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives submit yourselves to your own husbands as unto the Lord. The husband is head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of the water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church not having any spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy and without blemish, so ought men to love their wives as their own bodies, he that loves his wife loves himself.”
Sanctification, selfless living, self sacrifice, laying down your life, submitting one to another.
#1 Priority is laying down life for the wife, before everything else.
If you are loving God with all of your heart, that means that you are loving your wife with all of your heart, you cannot separate God and family! You can’t say “God first, family second.. “ no that doesn’t work.
Once you understand this and begin laying down your lives for one another, God will promote you, God wants those families out on the front line! Those are the ones that God wants as role models for the rest! Praying with the wife is very important, they don’t just want to be prayed for, but to be prayed with.
Is she happy? Is her face aglow because of how you treat her? So how much do you love yourself, this is reflected by how much you love your wife, He that loves his wife loves himself.
“For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourished and cherished it, even as the lord the church.”
Wives, be patient, it takes some time for some guys to get a hold of this.


I loved this class, lots I knew, lots that was reinforced in me, and some great stuff I had never thought of.
Hope it was the same for you!
-Ben Heath